Tag

real life

10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)

In Health

We all go through seasons of life that are great, and some that just plain stink.  It’s easy to go through the good times.  They’re good!  But how do we break free from those not so wonderful times.  I’m not talking about true tragedy or deep depression.  Please, if that describes you, ask for help.  I’m talking about those times where you just don’t feel like yourself.  When you don’t feel inspired or motivated.  Life can throw in these wrenches in from time to time and I like to be prepared.  These rough patches don’t have to be debilitating, use them to grow and learn more about yourself.Continue reading

More like this
Treating My Skin with Food
On Disappointment
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
What I Want To Teach My Boys

Body Image + Being a Boy Mom

In Mommyhood

I’ve see many posts about the importance of teaching young girls to have a positive body image.  With all of the magazine covers, social media, and all of the things we watch on TV, there is plenty of of fuel for negativity to thrive.  Our social standard for beauty in America is a bit twisted and realitively unattainable, even for the rich and famous.  Once I found out I was having a boy the first time around, I was relieved.  Thank goodness that was one thing I wasn’t going to have to deal with like girl moms do.  Thank goodness I wasn’t going to have to worry about a daughter having an eating disorder or constantly worrying about her weight and appearance.

But later, after another pregnancy and getting back my body after breastfeeding stopped, I started to think much differently.  Boys can have these same problems.  Just because the statistics are much higher for girls, doesn’t mean my boys are exempt.  I already see a perfectionist streak in Gav and it worries me.  I know what that feels like and it’s not that fun.  The urge to constantly be the best, or do everything, or be good at whatever you try can be exhausting.  Part of that, at least for me, was in my appearance.

Part of me hesitates to write this because I do realize that I am not a big person.  I’m short and have a realitivly small build but I can honestly tell you that that is not what I always see in the mirror.  I can’t help it.  I struggled with bulemia in college and that was a very hard place to be.  I grew up in the dance studio where being thin is longed for and praised.  I still struggle with it at times but never act on it.  Having a positive body image is a constant battle for me but I’m getting there.  Oddly enough, I’m the most confident in my body now, after two children.  But what does this mean for my boys?  I want them to learn two things from having a positive body image.  One is the obvious.  I want them to love themselves exactly the way God made them.  For them to know that they were fearfully and wonderfully made.  That they’re worth lies in the Lord, not some image that they feel they have to meet.  I want the same things for my boys that girl moms want for their daughters.  I want them to have self confidence, to own who they are.

To add to this though, I want them to see me as a woman who values herself.  Who finds her own worth in the Lord, not some image I feel I have to meet.  I want them to see a woman that respects her body and that a woman’s body is to be respected.  It is why I don’t ever act on my negative thoughts.  It’s why I pray for self control and courage.  It’s why I eat as best as I can and stay active.  I have to model this behavior for them as their mother.  I know that I can’t shield them from ever feeling badly about how they look feeling doubtful about they’re appearance.  Self consciousness is natural, especially in t hose oh so glamourous teenage years.  Not to mention how grateful I am that I didn’t have to be a teenager when social media came about!  (Seriously, thank goodness!).

As an adult, I have witnessed the negativity on multiple occasions.  I watch my students at the dance studio complain that they are “fat”, when they’re clearly not, more times than I’d like to count.  It breaks my heart, yet I know how they feel.  I’ve seen girls go through feeling hurt when the boys they hang around with or once dated call them names or belittle them.  Neither situation will be my boys.  They will learn that all bodies are beautiful.  That all bodies are on a journey.  It’s that old cliche, be nice to everyone because you never know what they’re going through.  I’m not naive to think that they will never have these feelings.  I just pray that when they do, that I have set the example of positivity. That I have been an example of finding my worth in God and not the cover of a magazine or movie poster.  I pray that they see that others are to be lifted up, not torn down and that each body is sacred, made in God’s image.

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”  Psalm 139:14

XO, Kelly

More like this
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
What I Want To Teach My Boys
4 Perils Of The Perfectionist Parent

Insta-Love

In Uncategorized

Instagram is an ever growing beast of a platform.  Every day I’m sure there are countless new members and a bi-jillion (yeah, bi-jillion) new photos ranging from sweet babies, to products, to exotic places.  I’ve seen a number of posts about what you shouldn’t post on Instagram and the like.  Well today I give you a list of what you should post on Instagram.  And yes, I’m (proudly) guilty of every single one!

1. Your Kids

Last time I checked, they are your kids, and it is your account.  If Instagram is how you choose to share their pictures with family, or to document their growth, or whatever, do it!  Some people have a large following and I get that they may not want to for fear of their child(ren)’s image being used without their permission.  That makes sense.  But if you’re not posting for fear that people may unfollow you (which that shouldn’t matter at all, life is not about followers) or that someone may be annoyed that you posted eight pictures of your kid, that’s crazy.  Post one, post them all!  Babies and kids are adorable and anyone that’s going to unfollow you because of that probably hates puppies too.

2. Your Food

Did you just have the best meal of your life?  Can’t resist taking a picture of that gorgeous array of desserts?  Post that ‘ish!  I love food, and clearly you do too.  If someone gets annoyed that you post a picture of your breakfast or your delicious looking ice cream cone against a brick wall backdrop, that’s their problem.  What about all of the famous painters that painted still life?  Paintings of fruit in a bowl?  I’m sure someone thought that was dumb back in the day too.  And no, I’m not comparing Insta-food to a Matisse, I’m just saying food can be pretty and should be photographed whenever you want.  This goes for coffee too because coffee if delightful and beautiful!

3. Selfies

Do you love your selfie?  Are you super excited about your outfit or the fabulous hair day you’re having?  I want to see it!  I don’t care how many times it took you to take the perfect picture, although I sincerely hope it didn’t take too long.  If you’re happy and proud of who you are and how you look, that’s beautiful!  I don’t post too many myself because half the time I’m still in sweatpants and no makeup at 2 PM and don’t nobody want to see that.  I like, as I’m sure you do too, to put my best foot forward.  If someone thinks that you’re posting them to be vain or you want to appear perfect, than tell me who doesn’t?  We’re all a little vain I think, we like to look good.  Nothing wrong with that!

4. Pictures of Your Feet

I know these annoy a number of people but I’m not really sure why.  Have nice shoes on?  Post those bad boys.  Feel like being artistic?  Get your Annie Leibovitz on!  Sometimes I’m standing on a really cool floor and I think it’s pretty.  I like pretty things, don’t you?

Basically, post whatever you want!  Well anything as long as it’s not, you know, inappropriate.  Don’t get yourself reported!  But just remember, it’s your account, your life, your memories.  If you want to remember something by documenting it on Instagram, go right ahead!  Don’t let a silly article, the threat of losing followers, or nay sayers dictate what you can and can’t post.

This also goes for bloggers that have one account for personal pics and their blog.  I’ve heard bloggers get worried about posting too much about their blog and people getting irritated by it.  Really?  That’s ridiculous.  If someone is following you for your personal pictures, to keep up with your life, then they should have no problem with your posts about your blog.  That’s part of your life!  So post away my fellow Insta-holics!  And while we’re at it, you wanna use fifty hashtags on one picture?  Do it!  Hashtag your little heart out!

Happy Gramming!
XO, Kelly

More like this
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
Body Image + Being a Boy Mom
It’s Been A Minute…
Life Lately

Life Lately

In Mommyhood, Uncategorized

Oh hey there! Remember me?

The past couple of weeks have been really…well, real.  We’ve had quite a bit going on in a short period of time and all the while life still had to happen.  Making sure the boys are taken care of, both my husband and I going to work, soccer and tae kwon do for Gav, summer camps, and so on.  I have felt more like an adult in these last few weeks than I have in my entire adult life and at the same time, I’ve felt like I’ve needed an adult other than myself.  I’ve been praying more than I ever have before, both in an effort to pray more and an effort to keep it all together.  Sometimes things fall to the wayside when life gets “in the way” and I’m so sad that this little space of mine was one that fell through the cracks.  I enjoy writing and I enjoy creating and those things have had to take a back seat.  But the storm is settling and I’ve recouped for the most part.

The Lord works in mysterious ways and I think that I can say with some certainty that his purpose in all of this, for me, was to grown up.  I have found strength that I didn’t know I had, strength I didn’t know I was capable of showing.  I’m very grateful for that.  So with all of that being said, I’m ready to fling myself back into somewhat of a routine and get back to business!

Hope all is well in your neck of the woods!
XO, Kelly

More like this
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
What I Want To Teach My Boys
4 Perils Of The Perfectionist Parent

3 Things You Need to Get Over When You Become A Parent

In Mommyhood

It pretty much goes without saying that life changes when you have kids.  It most definitely and overwhelmingly changes for the better but there are things within that change that are, I’ll say it, not so great too.  And it changes with each child you have too.  Of course it does!  Life is totally different now that I have two then when it was just one.  Everything takes a little more time, there are more little people that need my attention, I’m constantly moving, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.  These are things you can easily roll with and they’re not that difficult to deal with.  But I’ve found that there are three things that are so drastically different once you have little ones that you just have to get over them.  There’s no changing these facts, they’re inevitable, and there’s no way to get around them.

POOP
Once you become a parent, the “ish” can figuratively, and LITERALLY, hit the fan.  In our case, with Gav, the “ish” literally hit the curtains.  Your life becomes more about poop than you ever knew it could.  You are analyzing it, talking about it, checking for changes, checking its consistency, etc.  You’re buying diapers to catch it, getting special trash cans to dispose of it or, if you’re cloth diapering, you’re washing it. Even if you’re not cloth diapering, there are these things called blow outs.   You’ll be washing poop out of something/everything in no time.  You even worry about poop.  You worry if they’re pooping of much, pooping too little, if they’re constipated, and so on.  And last but not certainly not least, you’ll be wiping poo for a loooooong time.  Even when you get to that wonderful point that is potty trained (cue singing angels!), you’re still on tush duty.  And then if you decide to have more than one child, well, the cycle continues.  The book Everybody Poops becomes your reality but with the added reality that you’re the one cleaning it all.   You are the unpublished and unpopular sequel, Everybody Poops 2: Mommy and Daddy Clean It All Up!

MESSES
They are, and will continue to be, everywhere.  Kids don’t really get bothered by the mess either.   From the car, to kitchen, to the bathroom, to the diaper bag.  If it has space, that is space to fill with a mess.  That includes the children themselves.  Now this is not to say that you should just throw your hands in the air and let it go.  This is just saying that for the next 18+ years, you will be cleaning.  ALL. THE. TIME.  It’s inevitable and enjoyable all at the same time.  Sometimes, watching your child make a mess is fun.  They’re exploring.  But in the back of your mind, you know that it will be your duty to clean it up.  That’s mainly for young children though.  I know that once my boys are older, the messes they make will be less about exploring and little more about destroying and then I can hand them a broom or a wet towel and say, “Have fun!” Technically I can do that now, but I still have to go back behind Gav and get what he missed, he’s only 4.

But in the kitchen there are food messes and dried Play Doh, in the diaper bag there are crumpled receipts, crumbs, and countless straw and food wrappers, in the car there is spilled cereal and forgotten sippy cups.  Just grab a big ole’ bag and chuck it in there (Yes, even the sippy cups.  Those things get nasty!) with a smile because some day your car will be empty because they will be driving their own.

YOURSELF
This is probably the hardest one of all.  It’s no longer just you or you and your SO.  There’s a little being that needs you and depends on you.  Someone who needs to be watched every waking second and, for most of those first 18 years, can’t do certain things for themselves.  This is not saying that you should just forget yourself and everything should be about the baby/kids, but I am saying that you have to get over it.  Get over not getting to leave the house whenever you please or at least as fast as you used to, get over not being able to hang out with friends as much.  You’ll definitely have times where you can get out and those times will mean so much more to you.  Get over not sleeping (no seriously, if you take anything away from this, let it be that!).  Get over relaxing each night and winding down from a hard day.  That just becomes passing out in relief that you can blink without fear of someone hurting themselves.

But in all of this, it is truly and unbelievably worth it.  You become MORE than yourself.  These little things will test every particle of your being but fill them all with an incredible love you’ve never known.  So, take a deep breath (if you’re dealing with poop, breathe through the mouth) and just know that one day you won’t have to take care of any tush but your own and maybe one day you can hire a cleaning service.
XO, Kelly

More like this
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
What I Want To Teach My Boys
4 Perils Of The Perfectionist Parent

Little Mommy Luxuries

In Uncategorized

Motherhood is nothing short of amazing.  Every day I take care of these two little boys that I helped create, that my body grew, and taught me that I could love harder and fiercer than I ever thought possible.  But this is not to say that I don’t get tired.  That, at the end of the day, I’m ready for them to go to bed so that I can tumble into my own bed and relax.  I love every minute with my boys, this time is so short.  But here are a few things that, when I get the opportunity, I feel rejuvenated, recharged, and just like myself again!

  • Getting ready by yourself
  • Getting out of the car by yourself
  • Really just doing anything by yourself
  • Solo shopping trips, even to the grocery store
  • Let’s be honest, even errands can be fun if we can do them without buckling and unbuckling 5 hundred times.
  • Adult conversations
  • Quiet time (aka Silence)
  • Going to the bathroom uninterrupted
  • Reading anything that doesn’t rhyme
  • Listening to what you want to in the car
  • Turning the radio up (this usually happens on those solo shopping trips)
  • Watching anything on TV that doesn’t involve a cartoon character (Don’t get me wrong, I love me some Curious George and Nature Cat, but one can only do so much!)
  • Nap time!
  • Eating a full meal uninterrupted
  • Eating your dessert after the kids are in bed
  • The brief 10 seconds when the laundry is done, there aren’t any dishes in the sink, and everyone has been fed
  • Date nights
  • If you happen to wake up before your kiddos (yes, this actually happened for awhile before Ro started teething!)
  • When your kids get old enough to play for awhile (This usually maxs out at 20 minutes) by themselves
  • Staying up late…
  • …or going to bed early 
  • A whole day without having to change your clothes or theirs
  • Eating the “not good for your teeth” candy on any given holiday
Of course, at the end of the day, my heart is so full because of the crazy little things that God has placed in my care.  There is no other title I would rather have than “Mommy”.  But even if you are the most super mommiest of them all, even you need a break.  We all need to feel like we are our own person again.  But I’m not gonna lie, coming back to my boys after some much needed mommy time, is just as sweet!
What would you add to the list?
XO, Kelly
More like this
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
What I Want To Teach My Boys
4 Perils Of The Perfectionist Parent

1,825 days

In Uncategorized

1,825 days we have been married and we’ve only known each other for a handful of days longer than that.  I feel like it’s been so much longer though.  That, somehow, I’ve known you since we were kids.  We’ve packed a lot of life events into our little over 5 years together but that was God’s design for us.

There have been good days and bad days, easy ones and ones so difficult that all we could do was pray.  Such is life and I’m so happy that I’m living it with you by my side.

Happy Anniversary, Chase.  I would marry you today and every day.

I love you,
Kelly

More like this
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
Body Image + Being a Boy Mom
Insta-Love
Life Lately

Dear Naptime…

In Mommyhood

Oh Naptime, it’s been about 5ish months since you left us.  I miss you.

You were my “me time”, my time to blog, my time to work on projects uninterrupted.  I remember when we would get a guaranteed two hours (sometimes more, you spoiled me!) each day and I could eat without getting up fifty times, or watch a show from the night before.  Some days I could work on 3 separate projects and maybe even blog one of them before Mr. G even began stirring!

I knew that our time together would eventually come to an end, and I got more than most, but I wish you were still around.  Every now and then you come to visit for a car ride, sometimes you even stay after for a bit, but it’s never as long as it used to be.  And when you leave, Mr. G is almost always very upset.  He misses you too I think.

It’s been rough, I’m not gonna lie, but we’ve started to make due.  Our new “normal”.  Mr. G doesn’t particularly enjoy sitting with me during DIY projects, but if he can play with my iPad, he’s pretty content.  I’m sure it doesn’t help that school is out as well, so we’re full steam, no down time, all day long.

I see you around the corner though, you’ll be back to help out with RC.  Plus Mr. G will go back to school soon, so we’ll have our quality time again.  Until then, dear Naptime, I’ll just look forward to the very inconvenient late afternoon visits right before we get to the store or my work and “calmly” handle the cranky aftermath.

Yours Truly,
Kelly

More like this
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
What I Want To Teach My Boys
4 Perils Of The Perfectionist Parent

Mommyhood // Learning to Let Go

In Mommyhood

I’ll admit it, I have a problem.  I have a very hard time letting go of control.  And I’m not talking about life in general, which is still true, but I’m talking about with my child.  I’m a perfectionist with OCD tendencies with a toddler.  It’s an explosive combination to say the least.  And now we’ll (very) soon be adding another to the mix.

I wouldn’t call myself a helicopter parent, I’m pretty good about letting Mr. G explore when we’re outside, at the playground, etc.  I like to make sure that he’s safe so occasionally I’ll check in or go find him and make sure he hasn’t broken anything.  But the part that makes playgrounds and fast food play places hard for me (read: gives me anxiety) is the interaction with other kids.  I don’t want my child to be the one causing a problem and it’s very hard for me not to jump in every 5 seconds.  I understand that kids will be kids, but I don’t want him to feel like that behavior is acceptable and I also don’t want other parents to see it happening and me not doing anything about it.  I get a little embarrassed, I know I shouldn’t since all children behave pretty much the same, but I can’t help it.  It’s my need to control the behavior, control the situation.  I’ve fought the urge to leave many times and simply give Mr. G warnings and leave when it’s time or when it’s time for the consequence if necessary.

I have this need for everything to be done “right”.  So the independent threenager that wants to do things by himself and his crazy mama clash from time to time.  But also, I realized this can hinder him.  If I don’t let him brush his own teeth, let him wash in the tub, etc., what is that teaching him?  Do I want my child to rely on me forever?  No, I WANT him to become independent and self sufficient.  Which means he’ll do it “wrong” or not all the way/backwards/upside down or make a mess.

That brings me to the other area that is hard for me to let go, making messes.  I know….I know….I have a boy and will soon have TWO boys.  Just as I didn’t choose their genders, I did not choose to be a neat freak.  I grew up in a spotless home.  You think I’m kidding, but it’s true.  To this day, my parents’ house looks like the model home in any given neighborhood (nothing wrong with that, just a fact).  The messiest place in the house was always my room with clothes all over the floor because, hey, teenage girl problems.  But as I got older, had a home of my own, the neatness kicked it.  I became more and more like my dad, the man behind the tidiest home on the block.  Fast forward to now with a 3.5 year old running around with 5 million toys spread out across the family room, crumbs under his chair, and asking every 5 minutes to play with Play-Doh.  The latter I always try to put off for another day, and another day, and another day…

Another mess I have a hard time letting go of is food messes.  I don’t like the thought of stains on clothes, his or mine, and if it does I start to feel that “bent-outta-shape” feeling start.  Same with the spills on the floors.  Same with the caked Play-Doh in the Play-Doh toys.  Same with anything that might get “messed up”.  What do I do you ask?  I breathe.  Seriously.

I had a really hard time letting Mr. G do this at first.  But why?  What or who was it going to hurt? 

I take a deep breath and simply tell myself it’s not that big of a deal.  Because, in reality, I know it’s not. The mess on the floor can be cleaned.  Do I want to clean it? No.  But did my child eat?  Did my child have fun? Yes.  Which one is more important?

I try to remind myself of what I want my child to remember about me from this stage of his life.  Do I want him to remember a mom that always said no and was so caught up in her own anxieties of being perfect and/or clean that he felt he couldn’t do much of anything?  Or do I want him to remember a mom that loved him, let him explore, and taught him to be respectful?  I know the answer is easy, but the perfectionist in me has a very hard time letting go.  But I’m working on it, everyday, as we all are as parents.  I constantly remind myself multiple times a day to let go, my little voice in my head asks me “what’s the big deal?”. Because when it comes down to it, try as I might, I am not perfect, but I can try my hardest to be the best mom I can be for my children.

*Insert “Let It Go” from Frozen.*
XO, Kelly

More like this
I Signed Up For a 5K + Why You Should Have A Life List
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
What I Want To Teach My Boys
4 Perils Of The Perfectionist Parent

Real life // 20 Underrated Feelings

In Uncategorized

I recently saw this video from Buzzfeed and loved it.  It celebrates exactly what I strive to do each day, finding joy in the little things.  Here, take a look…I’ll wait…

One of my favorites is finishing a chore you hate…too true!
Scrolling through my Facebook feed, it’s easy to get bogged down by what I see posted from time to time.  It was very refreshing to see this little video in the midst of all the negativity that gets shared.  So today, I thought I’d add my own personal favorite feelings to the list.

1. Driving with the windows down
2. Watching your grocery total drop after the cashier scans your bonus card

4. Making a basket with a crumpled piece of paper from really far away
5. When your name gets called at a restaurant with a really long wait (bonus points: if you made reservations!)
6. A fresh, empty notebook

8. Actually doing something from a Pinterest board (bonus points: if it’s not a fail)
9. Getting a crafty inspiration
10. Finding the last item of something in the clearance section and it’s your size
11. Going to a candy store as an adult

13. Completing a complicated recipe and it tastes amazing
14. When someone compliments you on something you made
15. Buying your favorite dessert for no reason
16. Decluttering
17. Looking up at a clear blue sky

19. Finishing a good book and getting a new one
20. When your jam gets played on two stations consecutively

What are some of your favorite “underrated” feelings?
XO, Kelly

*All images found HERE.*

More like this
10 Things To Do If You’re In A Funk (+ One Don’t)
Body Image + Being a Boy Mom
Ten Little Things #143
Ten Little Things #142