As of about 4:00 today we will all officially be on Spring Break! I’m so excited because I’m off from all my outside obligations as well. I get to spend some quality time with the boys. I only have a few things set in stone with ages and times but other than that, we’re free to bounce around from different activities or change up plans depending on weather. Here’s what’s on list this year:
Many people talk about checking things off their bucket lists or things they’d like to do before they die. However, I refuse to have a bucket list, or rather, I refuse to call my list that. As with most things in life, I enjoy putting a positive spin on things so instead of focusing on what I want to do before I kick the proverbial bucket, I think of it as what I want to achieve in my life time. Same premise, less focus on the life ending part. I call mine my life list. Some of the things have specific time stamps and some do not. But why should you have one? I’m glad you asked!
We all go through seasons of life that are great, and some that just plain stink. It’s easy to go through the good times. They’re good! But how do we break free from those not so wonderful times. I’m not talking about true tragedy or deep depression. Please, if that describes you, ask for help. I’m talking about those times where you just don’t feel like yourself. When you don’t feel inspired or motivated. Life can throw in these wrenches in from time to time and I like to be prepared. These rough patches don’t have to be debilitating, use them to grow and learn more about yourself.
Over the past few weeks (months, years…) I’ve seen a steady increase in the lack of compassion and respect in the younger generation. Dear fellow grown ups of the world, we
need toHAVE TO do better. Whether it’s the need for stronger discipline, more love, or whatever, something needs to be done now. What I have seen lacking in the values of today’s kids, is exactly what I want to teach my children. I want to teach them how to be good humans.
There’s a huge difference from when I was a kid to now. Or maybe I was in my own bubble which is a huge possibility. I know I wasn’t a perfect kid, none of us are/were. I know there were times when I wanted to give up or felt unmotivated, times when I let the sass fly and times I was ungrateful. But I was taught, disciplined, put in my place, whatever you want to call it. And this is what I intend to do with my boys.
Becoming a parent completely throws a perfectionist for a loop. I use the term “perfectionist parent” in the sense of someone who has always been a perfectionist and has become a parent. I do not mean it in the sense that I expect to be the end all/be all in parenting or that my children must be perfect little robots. I’ve remarked in past posts about my OCD/perfectionist tendencies but, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten better at realizing that pretty much no one cares about certain things as much as I do. I’ve also learned to let some things go. This, however, does not mean that I don’t still get irritated,itchy, or anxious from time to time. I’m not perfect (GASP!) but my brain certainly tries to be. There are 4 areas I’ve found that are my “triggers” or things that make me get all hot and tight chested. If you’re a perfectionist parent like myself, I know you’ll totally understand!
*Thank you to VIIcode for sponsoring this post. The following is my 100% my honest opinion.
One of my smaller goals for this year is to do exactly what the title says, doing better for my skin. Why a smaller goal you may ask? Because, a lot of the time, doing better means getting better quality products which means dollar amounts higher than I’m used to. I want to do all the things that are better for my skin, especially now that I’m in my thirties (technically the beauty world says you should be using wrinkle cream in your 20s but whatever), but my budget just doesn’t allow me to completely overhaul my beauty routine with top of the line products. So, for now, I’m doing two things and today I’m sharing with you number one.
It’s that time of the school year already…the end! Summer is approaching (if you live in the south like we do, it’s already here) and it’s time for teacher gifts. Now, I’m a teacher myself and get a few gifts and I’m not one bit opposed to getting a gift card. Those are awesome and so appreciated! With that said, I just can’t stop my creative side from wanting to do more. I got this crazy idea in my head about a party in a box for Gav’s teachers and I had to run with it. It’s so simple, can be relatively inexpensive, and it so fun!
It feels like yesterday that you needed me for just about everything other than walking. I would wake you up, change your diaper, get you something to eat or drink, give you cuddles when you were tired, get you dressed, etc. I would push you on the swings and you would crawl up in my lap when you started to get sleepy.
Now things are different. Not a bad different just…different different.
My alarm clock goes off somewhere between 5:15 and 5:30 everyday. And by alarm clock, I mean Ro and/or my phone. Sometimes my phone will actually beat the little man to the punch but lately, it’s been Ro who wins. I used to get some time in the morning to myself but more often than not, I have my little buddy with me. My mornings start right away because Ro waits for no one. Changing the diaper (if he’ll let me), getting him milk, trying to make my coffee, and sometimes getting the dishwasher emptied and filled from the night before. Gav has always been a late sleeper so I can pretty much depend on him to sleep until 7:00 most mornings. But before I know it, it’s out the door we go to get to school. After drop off, it’s on to the next.
Mondays are Gymboree for Ro, Tuesdays and Fridays are workout days for me, Wednesday is small group, and Thursday is usually grocery day. Somewhere between these things and work, Ro takes a nap and I try to do house work and any orders or projects that need to be done. Unfortunately, Ro has been refusing a second one for awhile now so I haven’t been getting that extra time. Three days out of the week I work at the dance studio and then there’s tae kwon do for Gav twice a week and church activities on Sunday.
Why in the world did I tell you all this? Maybe to give myself a little perspective, maybe to cut myself a little slack? But it’s basically to say that I’ve had too many plates spinning in the air. That’s why I haven’t been able to find the time to sit here post about, well, anything! That also had a lot to do with the fact that we had a computer that was 10 years old and was slowly but surely dying before my eyes. Like seriously, that thing was on life support! This meant that any time I wanted to post something, I would need a block of about and hour just to boot the thing up and get the page open to type. Add another hour if I wanted to add pictures, which, of course, I do! But I’m happy to report that we took the plunge, made the investment, and I’m posting from my shiny, beautiful, and super fast new computer!
I’ve been feeling like I’ve been drowning in “plates” and I haven’t been able to get a balance but I’m figuring it out. I’m often asked how in the world I do it all. I don’t. Often times one thing gets sacrificed for another (a lot of times it’s the laundry because that requires climbing two sets of stairs) and that’s just how it is. Sometimes I have to sacrifice a chore and the blog because I have a deadline for a shop order. It all depends on the week but I’m starting to find a bit more of a balance. I have a fabulous new planner (thanks bestie!) that I make a point of looking at each day. I find little moments to brainstorm and have a nice list of ideas ready to go. I’ve also learned the beauty of saying no. It’s still not easy for me and I totally need to finish reading The Best Yes, but I’m working on it. I’ve picked my plates back up one at a time and they’re starting to spin again. I’m one of those people that likes to be busy, no idol time for this mama. I’m ready to get back to pouring more time into this happy little space of mine. If you’ve stuck around, you’re the best and I love you!
I’ve see many posts about the importance of teaching young girls to have a positive body image. With all of the magazine covers, social media, and all of the things we watch on TV, there is plenty of of fuel for negativity to thrive. Our social standard for beauty in America is a bit twisted and realitively unattainable, even for the rich and famous. Once I found out I was having a boy the first time around, I was relieved. Thank goodness that was one thing I wasn’t going to have to deal with like girl moms do. Thank goodness I wasn’t going to have to worry about a daughter having an eating disorder or constantly worrying about her weight and appearance.
But later, after another pregnancy and getting back my body after breastfeeding stopped, I started to think much differently. Boys can have these same problems. Just because the statistics are much higher for girls, doesn’t mean my boys are exempt. I already see a perfectionist streak in Gav and it worries me. I know what that feels like and it’s not that fun. The urge to constantly be the best, or do everything, or be good at whatever you try can be exhausting. Part of that, at least for me, was in my appearance.
Part of me hesitates to write this because I do realize that I am not a big person. I’m short and have a realitivly small build but I can honestly tell you that that is not what I always see in the mirror. I can’t help it. I struggled with bulemia in college and that was a very hard place to be. I grew up in the dance studio where being thin is longed for and praised. I still struggle with it at times but never act on it. Having a positive body image is a constant battle for me but I’m getting there. Oddly enough, I’m the most confident in my body now, after two children. But what does this mean for my boys? I want them to learn two things from having a positive body image. One is the obvious. I want them to love themselves exactly the way God made them. For them to know that they were fearfully and wonderfully made. That they’re worth lies in the Lord, not some image that they feel they have to meet. I want the same things for my boys that girl moms want for their daughters. I want them to have self confidence, to own who they are.
To add to this though, I want them to see me as a woman who values herself. Who finds her own worth in the Lord, not some image I feel I have to meet. I want them to see a woman that respects her body and that a woman’s body is to be respected. It is why I don’t ever act on my negative thoughts. It’s why I pray for self control and courage. It’s why I eat as best as I can and stay active. I have to model this behavior for them as their mother. I know that I can’t shield them from ever feeling badly about how they look feeling doubtful about they’re appearance. Self consciousness is natural, especially in t hose oh so glamourous teenage years. Not to mention how grateful I am that I didn’t have to be a teenager when social media came about! (Seriously, thank goodness!).
As an adult, I have witnessed the negativity on multiple occasions. I watch my students at the dance studio complain that they are “fat”, when they’re clearly not, more times than I’d like to count. It breaks my heart, yet I know how they feel. I’ve seen girls go through feeling hurt when the boys they hang around with or once dated call them names or belittle them. Neither situation will be my boys. They will learn that all bodies are beautiful. That all bodies are on a journey. It’s that old cliche, be nice to everyone because you never know what they’re going through. I’m not naive to think that they will never have these feelings. I just pray that when they do, that I have set the example of positivity. That I have been an example of finding my worth in God and not the cover of a magazine or movie poster. I pray that they see that others are to be lifted up, not torn down and that each body is sacred, made in God’s image.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14