Anyone read that title and immediately read it in the voice of Ross from Friends screaming? If you did, you totally get me.
But anyway, what does it mean? It means exactly what you think it means. I’m taking a break. A break from what? Short answer, basically everything.
I need a break. As a typical achiever, go getter, type 3, whatever you want to call me, I just from one goal to the next. I juggle 100 balls at the same time and I thrive in that. I excel in that. But at the same time, I don’t. I’ve come to a very open chapter of my life and I need some time to process it all. So I’m letting the balls fall. I’ve debated whether this was the right move for me or not. When this thought of a break popped in my head, I thought it was crazy but then I realized it was less my own thought and more of a prompt from God. This got confirmed for me while at church and the student pastor mentioned saying yes to something God has been asking you to do. *ugh* I immediately knew I had to do this. It is counter to what everything the advice posts tell you to do as a blogger. This will, in no way, be helpful for my growth as a blogger but I have to do it. And I have to be ok with it because my ways are not always what is best for me.
I announced on Facebook yesterday what many of those closest to me already knew. As of the end of recital this Sunday, I won’t be returning to my job as a dance teacher. It was not an easy decision and one that I prayed about for awhile. I feel led to pursue my other creative endeavors and to stay home with my kids. I can hear the questions already, “Kelly, don’t you only work two nights a week?” Yes, that’s true, but it’s two nights away from my kids while they still need me. Two nights a week when I’m not there when they go to bed. I feel like that is where I want to be and where I am needed most and I want to lean into that. I only have one more year where one of my kids isn’t in school for 8 hours a day and that’s just something that is important for me, personally. Of course, I can’t say I’m done forever with the world of dance, but for now, I’m packing that part of my life away.
I’ll also be taking a social media/blog break. I’m actually calling it my social media fast because, let’s be honest, we’re all addicted to it on some level. For two weeks (starting Monday), I will be sans the almighty Instagram and Facebook, and I won’t be writing here either. (Yeah, I know, I haven’t been that consistent here but go with it.) I will be deleting all the apps (while also praying that I don’t have to reset all my passwords when I put them back on because I don’t remember them) and putting the phone down. I was even contemplating not coming back here at all. Maybe I was done with this. But, I’m not. I’m not done writing. I don’t know who’s reading it, but I’m not done writing it.
So, long story short, I’m taking this time to get healthy. Mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, all the -allies. I’ve saturated my brain with image after image, caption after caption. I’ve zombied out to Facebook group threads and the everyday hustle of blogger life. I’m tired. I want to use this time to work on my spiritual walk with God, something I feel that has been taking a very undeserved back seat. I want to read more. I want to soak up the summer with my kids. I want to feel connected again. I want to feel connected with God, myself, my kids, my husband….I want to connect with the present. When I come back, I want to have a balance and I feel that but cutting it all off, ripping it like a band-aid, I’ll be able to see what I’ve been missing. I’ll be able to allow myself to breathe in the comfort of myself rather than the vicious cycle of comparison.
Thanks for taking this journey with me up to this point and thank you in advance for sticking around.